Leaves crunched beneath Olivia’s boots as she walked through the park.  She tightened her jacket to shield her against the cool weather.  After reaching the swing set, Olivia sat in the middle one and glanced around. 

                      Pumping her feet gently, Olivia soaked up the peaceful feeling of the park.  She needed to be in a quiet place like this to think and ponder about her future.  For the last six months, Olivia had been going through the motions of life, living day by day, but that had to change soon.  She had decisions to make.

                      But how?  If my counselor and my pastor can’t help me, then who can?

                       “Hey, Livie.”                                                                              

                       Olivia turned toward the familiar voice.   The sun blinded her vision.   She shaded her eyes with a hand and saw her boyfriend, Bryan.  Olivia jumped up and flung her arms around his neck.  Closing her eyes, she breathed in the scent of his cologne and enjoying his arms around her. 

                       “I’ve missed you.  I’ve been lost since you left.”  Olivia stepped back, cupping his face.  “I can’t believe you are here.”

                       Bryan smiled and caressed her cheek.  “I had to see you, but I don’t have much time.”

                       “Oh.”   She lowered her eyes and sucked in a breath, trying to keep her sadness at bay.  She wanted to make the most of the time with him, so she forced a smile.  “You’re here now. That’s all that matters.”

                       He took her hand and led her to a wooden bench.  After they sat down, he let out a breath. “Boy, being here brings back memories.”

                       “Like meeting a scrawny blonde girl?” 

                       “Yep.”  Bryan gave her a wink.  “And she grew up into a babe.”

                         Olivia felt her face getting heated.  “Thanks.  You did too.   Every girl in school was jealous I was your girlfriend.”  She glanced at the ground and shook her head in self-disgust.  “You deserved someone better than me.”

                         Byran put a finger under her chin and locked eyes with hers.  “Hey, don’t say that.  I’ve always loved you.  Even when I was six.”

                         Tears welled in her eyes. Unable to look at him any longer, Olivia pulled away and stood, turning her back towards him.  “How can you still love me?”

                        “It wasn’t your fault.”  Byran put a hand on her shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze.  “Please believe that.”

                        “I can’t,” Olivia said in a shaky voice.  “If we hadn’t gone to that stupid Keith Urban concert that I wanted to go to my car wouldn’t have broken down in the worst part of the city, we wouldn’t have gotten mugged and you wouldn’t have gotten shot and…“

                        “Died,” Byran finished for her.

                        Olivia turned and faced him, tears trickling down her cheeks.  “How can you stand to be around me knowing I didn’t do anything to stop that mugger from killing you?  I just stood there as he pulled out his gun and shot you, and then I ran.”

                        ”What else could you’ve done?   Wrestle him for his gun?”

                        “Yes.”

                        “Then you would have died too.”  He stepped closer and put her face in his hands.    “You did the right thing by running away.”

                        “But I left you.” 

                        “You had to.”  Bryan wiped her tears with the pads of his thumbs.

                         Byran shrugged.  “I wish I could go back and tell myself not to go to the concert.”

“Well, you can’t.”  He lifted her chin.  “Life is fragile.  You don’t know what is going to happen, but you can’t stop living.”  He sighed.  “Listen, Livie, I’ve been watching you since my death, and I’m worried about you.”

                         Olivia furrowed her brow.  “You watch me?”

                          Byran chuckled.  “Not all of the time.  They have rules up there about respecting our loved ones’ privacy.”

                          “Good to know.”

                          “Anyway, I was so worried that I asked to be granted a special pass to come down and talk to you.“  His gaze went Heavenward.  “They must be worried about you too, because those passes aren’t easy to get, especially for a newcomer like me.  God himself gave me information about your futures.”

                          Olivia's eyes widened.  “Wow.  What do you mean by my futures?”  She tilted her head.  “Don’t you mean future?"

                           “Well, you’re at crossroads now.”  Bryan brushed her hair from her forehead.  “If you keep blaming yourself for my death, the guilt will destroy you.  But if you accept that it wasn’t your fault, then you’ll have a bright future as a doctor and have a family of your own.”

                           “I had figured we would always be together.”

                           “We don’t always get the future we envisioned, but it can be even better.”

                           Olivia sniffed and wiped away tears.  “Are you happy?”

                           “Yes.”  He gave her a reassuring smile.  “I can help people-even though they can’t see me.   That makes me happy.   What would make me even happier is if you would accept the scholarship from Texas A&M, go to medical school, and be happy.  You’re meant to help and save people.  Please promise me you will.”

                           “You were always unselfish.” She smiled, her eyes sparkled with love for him.  “Okay.  I promise.  I’ll live for both of us.”

                           “That’s my girl.”  He looked up.   “I’ve to go now.  They’re calling me back.”

                            Olivia's heart wrenched and she leaped into his arms.  “No. Don’t go yet.”

                            “I have to.”  Bryan pulled away from her embrace.   “But don’t worry.  I’ll be there for you whenever you need me.”

                            “I love you.”

                            “I love you, too.”  He kissed her cheek.   “Goodbye.”

                           White orbs swirled around him until Bryan vanished. 

                             After he left, Olivia didn’t feel the emptiness and sadness she had expected.  The thousand-pound weight she had been carrying lifted from her chest.

                            Olivia glanced up and smiled.  “Thanks, Bryan.”